When does the fascination with all things princess start in a woman's life? The answer is two. I have a resident expert on all things Cinderella, Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, Ariel, and Majis (Jasmine to the rest of us). If there is a question of what one of these royal personalities might have for snack it is easily answered by soliciting the opinion of one Anna Kifer, aka. Cinderella. If there is debate about what color dress should be worn to the Prince's ball. That is easily resolved by her highness. These two examples are just the beginning of the knowledge I have gained on Disney royalty. There likes, dislikes, wardrobe etc..
In an act of goodwill I would like to take just a minute to share a little of what I've learned to all you other kings and queens of kingdoms near and far.
1. The two year old never morphs into any of the aforementioned royal beauties before the proper footwear has been put on. You are not to address her by any name, other than that which she was given upon birth, until both shoes are on fully. Also, and this is key, these shoes are never to be worn with socks. If the shoes don't give her blisters they are not meant for a princess.2. Princesses don't dance unless they are in full dress. This requires a gown of the
most exquisite fabrics and adorned with yards of frill and lace. Accessories, such as, a necklace, earrings, or a crown are optional. Unless the dress before you looks like it "twirls" no king, queen, or prince should dare approach the princess for a dance. Use the example to the left as a guide to a "twirly dress". One may be able to find such a beautiful dress deep in the royal closet of the Queen, after all she was a princess once too. 3. You may be under the impression that these galas a princess enjoys attending are meant for evening hours long after you've finished your banquet with the rest of the royal family. Not so, most princesses enjoy the all day rager that has her dancing from sun up to sun up. Trips to the kingdom playground are almost a good diversion.
4. Don't assume the desires, opinions, and attitude of the princess are the same as the two year old she morphed out of. Save yourself from hearing the lecture on why Cinderella doesn't bathe, eat, clean up her room, or obey in general. With the new identity comes a sense entitlement. It is her right to dress, speak, dance, eat, sing, run, and jump LOUDLY. Sometimes addressing her as the princess she is, ie Cinderella, or "your majesty" can help remind her that you are still king. This is not exactly a position of strength for the ruler of the world she knows.
5. The princess is a fickle personality. The goldfish that she had for snack yesterday may not be suitable for even the humblest of subjects in the kingdom today. The waltz that the king and princess danced yesterday can be exactly that, so yesterday.
Consider this a brief introduction into the complexity of the life and times of all animated royalty everywhere. My resident expert has found her way to bed for the evening and I am left to ponder the princess world alone. Without her insight I am lost.
3 comments:
Tim's brother's daughter Emmaline (who is 3), also has an obsession with princesses. It is something I cannot relate to. I don't ever remember going though that phase. Could be because I was a little girl before the onslaught of the Disney movies of the late 80s and early 90s.
Kifer,
Glad to find your blog here. Our Leah, who turns 4 next Monday, is also a princess fan. Whenever we play with her princess figurines ("action figures" isn't really appropriate for the princesses), the main rule is that I am not allow to interrupt the playing with any singing. Apart from the actual princess songs, our favorite is Steven Curtis Chapman's "Cinderella."
Apparently I was still logged in to Laura's account. The previous comment was from me.
-Kevin Koslowsky
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